Raging Nerdgasm #365 - eVolve Goliath from Funko

GI Joe Retaliation : Blind Master figure review

Off the bat I'm going to admit I have not seen this movie all the way through. I can't get through it, I walked out of the movie in the theater out of boredom. Out of what I have seen in the movie that I like is the Cobra flag going up over the White House and the RZA as the Blind Master. I would have never bet on them making a figure of the Blind Master, not unless it was a convention exclusive. The figure might as well have been an exclusive because it's not that easy to find. Apparently this figure has been out since October and I just stumbled onto it just this last week. After seeing him loose in someone's collection made me want this figure even more, I nearly bought it off eBay just to avoid searching for it.

I lucked into the figure at Toys R Us on an impromptu trip this week out of total boredom. The likeness is fairly good for the line, looks like RZA from his role in the GI Joe movie. I've always been hard on Hasbro's head sculpts on 3 3/4 inch figures but some of their figures from 30 years ago have better likenesses than the current figures on the shelf. I hate to use a number scale but this is a solid 8 out of 10 on the likeness. The figure reuses a lot of GI Joe figure pieces, which is most obvious on the Blind Master's hip where you find a gun holster. You may think it's a small thing but once I noticed it I couldn't do anything but just stare at it. Glaring mistakes are hard for me to overlook sometimes, I get all hung up. The accessories are abundant; bamboo cane that splits into a sword, the nine ring sword, a flute, a mask, a hat that doubles as a shield (and has positional blades) and a ring / Frisbee that looks like something from Master of the Flying Guillotine.

Overall, I'm satisfied with the figure. I think I'm more satisfied in the novelty of it being a figure of the RZA than it being a good GI Joe figure. This line kind of suffered that, at least in my opinion. The Joe Colton figure was an awesome 3 3/4 inch Bruce Willis figure but it was a mediocre GI Joe figure. If you like the Wu Tang Clan this is a treat to pick up and add to your collection. I've had 3 friends come over and see this and buy one online just on impulse.

TMNT Classics Bebop and Rocksteady Toys R Us exclusives

I was very lucky to fall into the brand new TMNT classics Bebop and Rocksteady just a few days before Thanksgiving. I will never understand the mentality of releasing toys the week of Thanksgiving or Christmas, it's infuriating when you collect modern toys and one of the many reasons I don't chase down toys at retail anymore. This was one of those exceptions for sure. While I didn't pick up the turtles I had made plans to get Bebop and Rocksteady from the moment they showed the production samples. I had my pre-order in with one of the major online retailers but when my order was cancelled (due to it being announced as a TRU exclusive) I knew I'd find myself wandering the aisles of Toys R Us with other forsaken man-children like myself. One good thing about the local TRU near me is it's rarely busy with other collectors so if there's something I want I can get it with little to no struggle which is good, after the 2nd strike out at retail I either give up looking for the figure or contemplate making an eBay purchase.

Rocksteady

Rocksteady comes in 6 inch scale with ample amounts of articulation, detail and decent paint applications. He also comes with updated reproductions of the original weapons he was packaged with in the late 80s; a military knife that would make Crocodile Dunee proud and some kind of automatic assault rifle that you'd expect to see Terry Crews carry in the Expendables movies. In fact, after mentioning that I would love to see Crews play Rocksteady, someone in Hollywood make this happen for me. Anyways, he comes with the standard display base with Rocksteady printed on it. the figure is a great mixture of 3 sources of media; the TMNT comic book, cartoon and original Playmates figure. The package is even embossed with the statement "inspired by the 1988 release". The face sculpt really stands out on this figure, it's probably my favorite part of the whole toy. The only fault I really found with him was the goggles weren't painted on his helmet like they were in the production samples but the helmet is removable with for me kind of balances out that flaw.

Bebop

Bebop was my favorite of Shredder's bungling henchmen. I was always drawn to the really rebellious punk look about him with his signature purple mohawk and matching sunglasses set him apart from Rocksteady. Bebop is reimagined in 6 inch scale by taking the best of what made him visually stunning in the TMNT comics, cartoon and Playmates figure. Bebop also has roughly the same range of articulation that Rocksteady has. He's looks a great deal bulkier than Rocksteady and comes with a reproduction of his signature drill gun. Sadly, Playmates omitted his other weapon from his debut figure; the trash can lid shield. While for most people it won't cause too much of a big deal to die hard fans it's kind of a glaring omission. I guess becuase he's a hair broader than Rocksteady they decided to do without the shield, for $20 I guess I expect too much. It's still a great figure either way.

 

 

I know I said I didn't get the turtles and I still don't plan on getting them any time soon unless they are on the cheap side. Roughly 2/3 of the ones I found at retail had off-centered eyes; they were either lazy eyed, cross eyed or wall eyed. The only "perfect" ones I found were at conventions and I wasn't willing to pay 30% over retail to get better painted ones. Even at that the turtles a friend of mine got suffered from Marvel Legenditis, where the knee or ankle joints (or both) got weak and couldn't support the weight of the figure. I have an intolerance to figures that collapse for no reason, especially when they "domino" other figures along with them. It's part of the reason I don't own Marvel Legends figures anymore (the other part was they were worth a ton of money and I was between jobs so they had to go). Anyway, even with the heafty price tag of $19.99 each at Toys R Us ($22.99 in some markets, check your local one for pricing) they are totally worth picking up and I don't get excited by modern figures much anymore unless they are imports or some kind of special release. Good for fans of the OG series and people just picking up on how cool TMNT is.

Adventure Time toys

Many of us are Adventure Time fans and when it was announced at NYTF (that's New York Toy Fair for those that aren't hip to the groove) that Jazwares was named the primary production company for everything Adventure Time related, I was slightly concerned to say the least. Jazwares was a very familiar company for me because they supplied my former employer, KB Toys, with a ton of poorly constructed toys based off of properties such as Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter, Sonic the Hedgehog and numerous defective electronic toys and room decor. But how badly could they screw up such simplistic designs as Finn and Jake? My questions were answered one fateful Monday morning during a toy run with my wife.

It really hadn't been much of an exciting morning to say the least. Three Walmarts and 2 Targets later we found ourselves at Toys R Us's doorstep and my wallet still had all the money in it that I left the house with. I really must thank my wife for putting up with my man-child impulses, I have been going to toy stores all my life and it's a habit I don't see going away anytime soon. Browsing the toy aisle with much dismay I came across the 2 foot long section of Adventure Time toys, which had been empty for most of the month till today. There on the pegs were the 5 inch Finn and Jake and Finn's sword of mighty, the shelf below had the 7 inch plushies and the shelf below that had the 10 inch Finn with changing expressions. My eyes got big like a kid on Christmas morning as my wife and I squealed for joy and grabbed the 5 inch figures and the 10 inch toy. Running for the registers, I couldn't wait to open these and display them proudly on my shelves at home.
                                             
The first knee jerk reaction came just before checkout when I remembered reading on the 4chan/toy message boards that fellow collectors felt the figures could have been done better. I couldn't remember what exactly was the issue, but I'm a consumer and anything I feel isn't made right can go straight back to the store as long as I hold on to that precious receipt. The second knee jerk reaction came while looking at 5 inch Jake and 10 inch Finn and thinking why not just get the Finn and Jake that are in scale with each other. My wife said she'd pick up the 10 inch Finn as long as I got the 5 inch set, at that point I couldn't say no to that offer. Besides, they look totally awesome and Jake shape-shifts all the time so my concern with scale went completely out the window.
                                            
                                            
Here's where the sobering realization that these figures were as poorly made as everything else Jazwares makes, has made or will ever make. Opening the figures in the car, I notice the knee and hip joints for both figures have been painted over. Not just a slight over spray, but intentionally painted over like someone didn't tell the child labor not to do that. Also, while the rubber arms translate well for Finn and his sword they don't work out so well for Jake's big fist attachment. The whole figure falls over. And while the first couple of times it's very comical, it becomes frustrating after a while. Secondly, for what you pay for ($9.99 or in my case $7.49 since they were on sale) you kind of feel like you are getting ripped off. The figures are hollow plastic and look great in the package but feel like a happy meal prize in your hand. And lastly, just with mild posing the paint starts to chip off. I'd hate to see how long these toys last in a 5-7 year old's hands. You probably wouldn't get out of the parking lot without having to turn around to exchange or return the figures.

If I had to grade these toys on a report card, they'd get a solid D. My summary, keep them in the package folks. They look wonderful until your breach that veil of cardboard and plastic and I have a strange feeling they won't be in production for long.