The wonderful world of Celestra: Queen of the Transforming Dolls

The toy world has seen a lot of strange things. It's a vast, expansive world full of legendary licenses, the mediocre, the uninspired and plenty of pretenders clawing for whatever glory they can attain. I consider myself a perpetual student of my craft, there is no one person that knows everything about toys made in modern history. Anyone who claims to be all knowing is a damn liar, I've gone toe-to-toe with the best and left them defeated and yet I've been bested in a game of wits based on toy knowledge. But enough comparing peckers, we are here to talk about the toys.

I'm a sucker for obscure toys, the only down side of obscure toys is the price tags they carry. Most of the time they are artificially inflated but there are few times where I can say the price reflects it's actual value. Now some people get terms confused when I say obscure and bootleg. A bootleg can be obscure but a bootleg is usually an unlicensed reproduction or facsimile of a popular line or character made out of usually substandard materials. An obscure figure can be anything from a licensed toy from a well done line (IE- Scratch from TMNT) or a non-licensed figure from a line made to capitalize on the success of another line (or simply put, a knock off). Knock off figures are most of the time made to play with the figures from whatever line they are trying to mimic but what happens when a figure transcends the borders a couple of genres? Well, you are left with the brilliantly half baked toy I've painstakingly built up so much in the last two paragraphs. I have a flair for dramatics and wordy expositions, those of you who have trudged through it are rewarded.

Celestra was reportedly Queen of the Kingdom of Transforming Dolls. It's a tiny soveriegn nation with a known registry of 4 known citizens; Queen Celestra, Vulcania Thrusterbottom, Saturnia Rings and Zarla Mercedes-Benz. I'm assuming Zarla is a widow as I have never met anyone else claiming citizenship of Transforming Doll Kingdom. As far as I know the nation doesn't have a spot on the UN security council which I feel is in poor taste because who else can properly save the world from the threat of WMDs if it isn't a team of women from a land where everyone transforms into some kind of mechanical conveyance? I don't see France stepping forward with a transforming Eiffel tower or croissant or anything like that.

Placo Toys made the transforming dolls. Now Placo hasn't really made much of a dent in the toy world and as far as I can tell they still exist. They found a convenient nitch by making a lot of generic toys that can be easily turned into licensed products with a well placed graphic slapped on it like ping-pong ball guns, flashlights, garbage cans and keychains. Other than Celestra their only other action figure forays seem to be 8 inch tall boxed Universal Monsters (similar to the carded or tagged Imperial ones) and some incredibly dull Youngblood figures (before McFarlane toys did them quasi-justice). One thing I can say they did well other than these Celestra figures were the die-cast and articulated Star Wars key chains and figural Mortal Kombat key chains that trumped everything Jazwares ever did with the Mortal Kombat license.

The Celestra dolls are 4 1/2 inch articulated female figures with rooted hair and a comb accessory. Not enough figures today come with combs, I literally have jars of swords and guns but very few combs. Each of the dolls are removable from their transforming cocoons but I can't verify if the cocoons are interchangeable. The idea of a transforming dolls is madness, but I guess gender ambiguous kids had a big share of the market back in the 80s. I'm not sure if a young me would have been drawn to these or not, I can't begin to think I'd choose it over a Go-Bot or a clearance Super Natural figure. It's not a Reese's Cup, these are two tastes that don't taste great together and it looks like the toy you'd see if you were stuck at a CVS or Walgreen's picking up medicine. But my appreciation of older and obscure toys makes this toys all that much cooler in my adult life.

Anakin Skywalker on tri-logo card by Kenner 1983

(credit goes to Wizard of X for this amazing photo)

Power of the Force was the most unique series created by Kenner for the Star Wars figure line. The line was rich with characters that barely had more than 15 seconds of screen time, which was a rarity since Star Wars was a line driven by main characters instead of perifial characters. This line was a fanboy's dream come true because by this point we all had 5 different Lukes, 5 Leias, 4 Hans and (of all characters) 3 Landos! Each figure came with a alluminum collector's coin that corresponded to the character in the package. This was Kenner's attempt to breathe a little life into the license by adding some unqiue figures to the series, unfortunately this line came out in 1985 and it was Kenner's last time out with Star Wars till the mid 90's when they attempted to revive it with bendable rubber figures. Dubbed as the last 17 in many circles, the Power of the Force line was responsible for such great additions Han in Carbonite, Amanaman, Yak Face, Imperial Dignitary, Luke in Storm Trooper disguise, Imperial Gunner, Barada, EV-9D9 and today's topic; Anakin Skywalker.

(today's catch, it may be a little rough but it's seen things man.)

Anakin came to me on a Tri-logo card. Tri-logo cards were released overseas and displayed the title of the line in English, French and Spanish. Most of the time the back of the card was incomplete; either the figure count on the back wasn't consistent with the character that was attached to it or some of the figures were blacked out on the back. Some tri-logo figures did hit US stores near the end of Star Wars' run as the dominant force in the toy aisles, unfortunately a good portion of these figures hit clearance on damaged cards (card cut in half, the non-English phrases blacked out with magic marker or smashed bubbles). The one I picked up wasn't in too bad of condition, the buble is cracked and coming loose on the right side but the card is in perfect condition with no yellowing, wrinkling or warping. The figure inside is totally mint, without a single flaw and I doubt it's ever been touched since 1983.

(acted better than Hayden Christensen in 3 minutes, 'nuff said)

The ghost of Anakin Skywalker was one of my favorite scenes from Return of the Jedi because it made no sense at all. We all knew (before the prequels came out) that Darth Vader was “more machine than man” and probably looked nothing like Sebastian Shaw. But, if you suspended disbelief for a second you could imagine that if Anakin hadn't been corrupted by the Dark Side of the Force, this is what he may have looked like. A smiling old man in grey and white robes who brought balance to the force (which is true if you think about it. It went from 100's of Jedi vs 2 Sith to 2 Jedi vs 2 Sith, whatcha' think about that?). Anakin has the basic Kenner five points of articulation and even though it's a really monotone figure the colors are very rich.

(yub yub indeed!)

Super Sized Death Squad Commander from Gentle Giant

I have been on the fence about the new large scale Kenner Star Wars figures from Gentle Giant. Mostly because of the hefty price tag that accompanies them. At near $80 a figure, who can afford to buy the whole set or bleed it out at one figure a month? Granted, they are a nice and showy piece of Star Wars memorabilia but I wouldn't pay more than $50 a figure. Then comes the daunting task of finding prime display space for the figures or storing them to avoid damage. Needless to say, I had avoided even getting into the collection until I found out about the website THWIPSTER.COM

(selling the hype, one crummy cardboard display at a time)

THWIPSTER.COM is a discount website that has a constantly revolving supply of discounted toys, comics and other related merchandise. The prices are incredible and shipping is cheap, if you don't shop them you should really start. I noticed one day I had missed out on getting a great price on the Obi Wan Kenobi from this set, by the time I had moved money around from one account to another it had sold out and never got restocked. But, since they got in one at an amazing price I figured only a matter of time before another one would grace their page. Two days later they'd restocked, but with the Death Squad Commander. While this isn't exactly my idea of how I wanted to test drive this line, it was an inexpensive venture that I knew I'd be able to get more that my money back if I decided it wasn't my thing.

(the fake excitement is just as grating now as it was 30 years ago)

Cheap shipping equals weeks of waiting for your product. While I don't mind, part of me wanted to know if I made the right decision. When it finally got to my door and I opened the box, I was immediately hooked. The figure is on a very well done oversized reproduction card with resealable bubble. The outer bubble is made of a sturdy plastic and the card itself is printed on a semi-gloss heavy card stock. Inside the bubble, the figure is snugly encased in it's own custom tray and secured with twist ties. While in the package, the figure can be either stood up on a shelf or hung on the wall from the already punched pegholes.

Once out of the package, the first thing noticed is the figure is completely hollow. This is why I don't think the figures are worth much more than $50 a piece. Overall, the quality of the figure is top notch. Really well painted, no flaws I noticed on mine at least. Tight joints that will hold their pose while displayed on a shelf or lightly played with. The only complaint I had was the gun; to me it just looked too chunky, like they got the scale wrong but I could be mistaken. While holding it, you forget you've got a 12 inch figure. The size is very pleasing, I mean the commander's helmet is almost the size of an infant's cereal bowl.

(give 'ems a kiss love)

Final opinion on the line, get the characters you like and don't buy the whole set unless you get a good deal. Shop websites for daily deals like THWIPSTER.COM and TOY SALE BOAT on facebook.

Centurions Ace McCloud flashlight from Kenner

Centurions: Power X Treme was a half hour American cartoon brought to us by Ruby-Spears and animated in Japan by Sunrise in 1985 as a 5 part miniseries with was followed up by a 60 episode season in late 1986. Comic book legends Jack Kirby and Gil Kane contributed to the design and concepts of the show and some of our favorite voice actors of 80's cartoon lent a hand at bringing the characters to life. Kenner brought the world of Centurions to toy store shelves and DC Comics provided a comic book series that was sold all over the world.

Centurions was a great series of 8 inch scale action figures with the ability to “plug” in upgrades to take on any challenge, much like the TV show. The line was comprised of 3 three heroes(Ace McCloud, Max Ray and Jake Rockwell), 2 villains (Hacker and Doc Terror) and about a dozen or so add-on kits to make taking on challenges on land, in the sea or in the air easier. About 32 holes lined the heroes jumpsuits where you could mix and match upgrade pieces, giving a sense of creativity to any kid who played with them. It was such a hit at retail that Remco (famous for knock-off toys) made their own version called Man-Tech. It Never had a chance and only lasted a few months at retail before hitting clearance.

Along with full sized figures, Kenner made a series of 3 ¾ inch figures outfitted with flashlights or binoculars. The figures themselves were almost identical to their larger counterparts with only a few exceptions. I think it could have grown more popular if they had pushed the 3 ¾ figures harder with actual mission specific attachments. Mind you not every figure in the set was as cool as Ace McCloud here, the Doc Terror figure really blows since the flashlight is permanently stuck in his chest.

Ace McCloud here is the perfect scale to slide into a GI Joe or Star Wars battle. Poseable at the shoulders and hips, the figure loses articulation at the elbows and knees which is the only place this figure fails. Ace still has all the ports on him the 8 inch figure does , which makes me think where this line could have gone at a smaller scale. The red rocket backpack takes 1 AA battery and is wired to the lamp head, which will plug into the figure wherever you can find a hole. The only other minus I’ve found about the figure is the lack of removable helmet, but depending who you are is the real deciding factor whether this ruins the toy for you. All things considered, it's a really cool pocket-sized interpretation of the figure that kids of the 80's could have taken with them everywhere.